Anonymous asked: Hey guys, could you help me out with the lyrics to (Do it on my) Twin Bed?

nbcsnl:

Sure anon! Here you go:

(Do It On My) Twin Bed” lyrics

  • Written by: Eli Brueggemann, Chris Kelly, Sarah Schneider, Aidy Bryant and Kate McKinnon
  • Performed by: Kate McKinnon, Cecily Strong, Noël Wells, Vanessa Bayer, Nasim Pedrad, Aidy Bryant, Jimmy Fallon

Spoken word: Hey it’s your girls… Kate, Cecily, Noël, Vanessa, Nasim, and your lil baby Aidy. We’re home for the holidays, and this year… we brought our boyfriends home with us. But just because we’re back in our mom and dad’s house, doesn’t mean we can’t still get a little nasty…

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Song: Back in town visiting my mom and dad / But that don’t mean I don’t wanna be bad / Say what’s up to my cousins (Hiiii) / Say what’s up to my neighbors (Heyyy) / Then take my man to my childhood bedroom.

This is my old christening dress / And here’s my stack of X-Files on VHS.

Now we’re gonna freak (freak) / In my monkey sheets (sheets) / That I’ve had since I was a kid.

All: Let’s do it on my twin bed (twin bed) / Not gonna like it (like it) / But it’s the only option (option) / Where we can get it poppin’ (poppin’) / Let’s do it on my twin bed (twin bed) / Pop and fall off it (off it) / But let’s get wild (wild) / In a bed for a child. (child)

If you want an old cat to watch you bone / Then you’re gonna want to get down in my parents’ home / It’ll make you spotty (spotty) / While you lick my body (body) / Then he’ll throw up on your bag!

Come on, sexy boy, gotta do this quick / While my folks are at the pharmacy; my mom is sick / She’s got a cough (cough) / She got it from Jean (Jean) / And now it’s a whole thing with Jean.

I’m glad you got to meet my Uncle Ted / Now keep it down ‘cause he’s asleep on my trundle bed.

Uncle Ted: Hey don’t mind me (me) / We’re family (leeee) / Did ya hear Aunt Ruth is dead? (sad)

All: Let’s do it on my twin bed (twin bed) / Even though Aunt Ruth’s dead {Ruth’s dead) / Wish we had more room (more room) / But grandma got the guest room (guest room) / But we’ll still get nasty (nasty) / Up against my trophies (trophies) / You’re a certified hottie (hottie) / Like JTT. (JTT: Aww, thanks!)

Fallon (rap): Girl, you know I love you, but let’s be clear / I’m having lots of trouble gettin’ horny here / I wanna get down and do my thing / But your childhood bed has antique springs / And I guess your mom don’t know how to knock / Keep my foot on the door ‘cuz it doesn’t lock / I can’t fully undress in case your parents come through / Just shirt, no pants, like Winnie the Pooh / And why am I even tryin’ to get laid / Near a photo of you from seventh grade!

Let’s take it back now, y’all!

All: So let’s do it on my twin bed (twin bed) / Not gonna like it (like it) / But ya can’t be picky (picky) / When you’re staying with your family! (family)


Fallon: I’ve been sexing in a tiny twin bed, y’all.

McKinnon: Happy holidays.

Bryant: We out.

factota:

"i don’t support feminism because i don’t hate men"

image

and-im-dooneese:

"Okay, now open the case" - Kristen Wiig in SNL’s Deal Or No Deal 

tagged → #snl #kristen wiig
When I thought I had a snack saved but then remember I already ate it

whatshouldwecallme:

image

deputyfuckingparrish:

let’s talk about what a fab human dan radcliffe is…

fuckyeahbillhader:

The Skeleton Twins | Official Trailer 

"Friendzoning is a terrible thing. The idea of a friend zone is like a terrible, male…have you ever heard a girl say she’s in the friend zone? It’s a thing I think men need to be really careful about using. When they were kicking around titles for What If, before What If was chosen, I think that came up, and I was like, ‘No! Don’t do that!’ Do I think men and women can be friends? Yes, absolutely. Do I think men and women who are sexually attracted to each other can just be friends? Eh, it will probably become an issue at some point whether you deal with it, and talk about it and just move on, but it will always sort of get dealt with eventually…I definitely think the idea of friend zone is just men going, ‘This woman won’t have sex with me.’"
Daniel Radcliffe, getting it (via falulatonks)
tagged → #daniel radcliffe

seriouslyamerica:

CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS FOR A SECOND? Because this is my favorite part in the whole movie. Mulan is back to wearing traditionally feminine clothing, and Shan Yu is mocking her “Looks like you’re out of ideas.”

BUT Mulan is all FUCK NO and disarms that asshole with a GODDAMN SYMBOL OF FEMININITY.

NOT TODAY SHAN YU. NOT TODAY.

tagged → #mulan
youngandjustus:

-everysecond:

OH MY GOD

IM CRYING THIS IS GREAT

youngandjustus:

-everysecond:

OH MY GOD

IM CRYING THIS IS GREAT

john-paul-george-ringo-fan:

" What a fucking great band we were"
- Paul Mccartney

john-paul-george-ringo-fan:

" What a fucking great band we were"

- Paul Mccartney

weightliftingcanadian:

Karnam Malleswari (-69kg), India’s first female Olympic medalist. She won bronze in Sydney in 2000.

tagged → #the lego movie